Hundreds of
students gathered at these and discussed a wide variety of issues but mainly about how to
start a revolution in the United States, which we all felt was a necessity. However, the
SDS split in late 1969 between old socialist groups and new radical militants. The
socialists wanted to appeal to the working class and tried to appear straight and
conservative. I found their approach quite unappealing. At one point I considered
joining the more militant groups, but was held back by my pacifistic nature. The anarchist
approach most agreed with my individualistic nature, so I joined an anarchist group, but
they were clearly a small minority that no one took seriously. Along with my intellectual and political friends I started to regard the hippie
movement as rather superficial, anti-intellectual and hedonistic. The fun-loving,
drug-taking way of life seemed rather shallow during such a crisis of war and
exploitation. The fun-loving, drug-taking way of life seemed rather shallow during
such a crisis of war and exploitation. I wasnt content merely seeking enjoyment but
was looking for some higher goal, whether political, intellectual or spiritual. At the
same time I continued with my spiritual and philosophical studies.
With my poetic and mystical background, I soon found
all such political groups to be too outward in mentality. I decided that the spiritual
life was better and returned to poetry and meditation as my main activity. I never
returned to political involvement in America through I did preserve a strongly leftist,
anti-bourgeoisie and anti - establishment mentality for many years, which to a great
extent still remains with me. |